THAT kind of Love

Oh boy, things have been tough lately. I'm finally back to a place of focusing on what's right in my life instead of what I perceive is wrong. Mark is doing a little better. His energy has been way low, and so have his hemoglobin and white blood cell counts. We haven't chosen to have a blood transfusion, yet, so that's good. The kids and I are taking turns being sick, and we have to keep the sickness away from Mark. Not easy. I've been evaluating our family schedule and have made some big changes lately. It feels sad and good at the same time. I've done some soul-searching while shoveling snow and I am feeling better. Mark and I are in love. I know everyone already knows that, but I don't mean residual love, we aren't just going through the motions after a hopeful commitment to eachother made long ago. I mean that we continually dig deep and re-discover the person we married. It isn't always positive either...we have had to look at the unpleasant and figure it out. Time reveals that some issues just aren't what we thought they were, and some are able to be overcome. What good news! We don't always agree, we've hurt one another's feelings and we even bug eachother at times, but it is a beautiful miracle to me that we are where we are....in love! I've received many complements about our marriage over the years. Sometimes we deserve them and sometimes we don't. We can do better. Funny tho, many people have told me that I'm "lucky" because my situation was "meant to be." I can honestly say that I disagree. An awesome marriage isn't by luck. Two people screen eachother, then commit to eachother then work hard every day, whether it's easy or it's hard to love the other person. Now, this is the key element, are you ready? We should love Heavenly Father more than we love our spouse, and we should love our spouse more than we love ourselves. If we can focus on those as our priority, the rest should fall into place. We forget sometimes because our human nature tells us otherwise. I honestly believe that any couple that have chosen to marry can have THAT kind of love. It's a matter of a deep level of love, not luck or destiny. There will be times of doubt, distance and discouragements but we can work through them. The rewards are HUGE! I don't mean to ramble, but I've had an emotionally challenging week, and looking at our pictures and remembering our love and affection over the years has brought me healing. I love healing. I love LOVE!