Unpredictable

     Today has not been a good day.  Mark is so weak he cannot sit up on his own.  He is still sick, really sick.  He cannot eat and can only sip a little.  We now have a home health nurse who was just approved today.  We spoke together for an hour before she went to meet Mark and take his vitals.  Unfortunately he was so sick at that time that all he could do was shake his head, 'no'.   She plans to be here tomorrow anyway, so she stated she would do vitals then.  She will have to take blood for lab work on certain days of the chemo cycle.  Ifosfomide typically creates a low platelet count.  We'll have to watch and see if Mark will need an infusion.  We've never been faced with this situation before.

     Once our nurse left, she immediately correlated with our team at the Huntsman.  I received a call from them letting me know that they are worried about Mark being hydrated, and his potassium levels.  The home health nurse will return tonight, asap, and put in a peripheral IV, run fluids and some anti-nausea meds that should help him do better. 

     I'm the type of person who likes to organize and control as many elements in my life as I can.  Cancer kicks my butt in this area.  It takes away my sense of control over my time, energy, plans, emotions, and comfort.  Cancer doesn't care that we've got five children that need our time and attention.  Cancer doesn't care how much time, money and energy we invest in trying to minimize it's damage.  Cancer sucks.